Center for Creative Youths 2012

Good day, viewers! This blog entry will be my detailed experience and current reflection of the time when I attended Wesleyan's 2012 pre-college summer program called 'Center for Creative Youths'.

CCY is a five-week program for high school students to get a taste of college life. Working artists help students with creative challenges, give advice about college, and support their growth in the arts. Students also take weekly classes to build leadership skills. After the program ends, students return to their schools or communities to lead their own art projects. When the program is over, each student gets a written review of their progress. CCY brings together young artists from many different places, backgrounds, and cultures, offering a rare and valuable learning experience. Three key parts of the program help students grow as artists, students, and people: connecting with other talented students, learning from experienced artists through focused practice, and finishing their own leadership art project. Many former CCY students have gone on to pursue careers in the arts and other fields. A study by Dr. Lynn H. Schultz from Harvard University found that CCY students improved in three main areas: creative thinking and problem-solving in their art, confidence and drive, and making better choices about their future careers.

This journal is a different type of journal. I'm currently home for the weekend before I leave in two hours to return to my dorm and my brief "college" life for three more weeks.

The two weeks over there was...WOW. So much to talk about. I really don't know how to start. I've experienced things that were completely outside my comfort zone, that I didn't know how to handle.

The first week was hard. It was fun, but at the same time it was...sad. I was homesick, and every time I thought about my mother's face, the way she left my dorm room almost crying, I would fight back tears. When I call my mother, and I hear their voices, it is hard to fight back tears. It was awkward to meet people. The conversations are always about the same thing.

1. Hi, what's your name?

2. Where are you from?

3. What's your major?

And that's it. Very awkward. 

The classes are VERY, VERY HELPFUL. I learned so much more in just two weeks than what I can learn in school for 8 months. I learned how to draw the human body in just under 5 seconds, and now drawing a body becomes very easy for me. I'm learning how to use charcoal easily, how to paint with ink without messing up the paper, and how to use the principles of art. I used to lay my paper flat on a table or surface, having my face up close to the sketchbook. Now, I'd rather stand drawing on a tall easel, allowing distance from the paper. I still have a lot to learn. 

I also took stage combat, and I learned a lot of self-defense moves, as well as delivering my own attacks. I had to perform last Friday (the 13th) in front of... I believe 150 students of my stage combat moves. At first, I was scared shitless. I didn't want to go up there. I wanted my mother to pick me up early. However, I decided to face my fears and just do it.

Best. Decision. Ever. 

Not only did I face my fears, but I feel a lot more confident in myself than I did in 3 weeks. I'm letting loose, and not building up a huge brick wall.

I have a roommate, but we have 2 rooms within a room, so technically we're not sharing a room. 

The second week was better for me. Meet a hell of a lot of different people. Hung out with my friends. Danced for the first time. Saw two kick-ass movies.

Sure, I can't bring a laptop. Sure, getting to the library is like trying to become Superman (horrible analogy, I know...), and I say it's difficult to get to the library, because at 2:00, it's my "ID" class. Kinda like a minor class. It ends at 4:00 and the library closes at five (for us...). I only have an hour on the computer. So, usually after the stage combat class, I have to rush to the library looking like a bum in my exercise clothes. Oh, and let's not forget that it's on the other side of campus.

I get there by 4:15, you know, after I ran to get there, and I only have enough time to watch my gaming videos. HOWEVER, the food over there is BLAZING. I love to eat there. Such great food. 

There's so much to say that I don't know how to finish this journal. When I come back home on August 4th, I'll sum up my entire experience in a new journal. Hopefully, once I leave to go back today, everything gets better.

Though my feelings about leaving home, going back to my dorm...are all pretty neutral. I love my home, because...well, it's home! I'm relaxed here. However, the college life that I have now isn't bad, either. I'm always socializing, which is something I'm not used to or doing so much. I'm always meeting new people and learning new things. Sure, once I'm over there, I'll feel a bit homesick again; down in the dumps. But then after a couple of hours or once the next day starts, I'll start to love it again. Another thing that I have to consider is that this is just for a little bit. It's not like I'm living there forever or anything. I have already gone through the worst part, and it's the first day. I'm going into my third week, so it'll be 2 more weeks to go. My parents are always telling me to just enjoy it and have fun. At first, I didn't know what they meant. After a couple of days, I understood what they meant...mostly. 

I just had to get used to it. Like I said, hopefully things will get better.

It's currently 1:58 pm right now. I have to eat and get ready, so by 3:00 pm I am on the highway to go back. I have to be back by 4:30 pm. Tonight, I'm going to be watching a movie. Later!

Although this program is no longer active, I believe in this program's mission statement and its curriculum as it has radically changed my life and impacted my worldview on not only the art world, but also on the real world itself in such a unique way. More college institutions, especially art schools, should look into funding and providing this level of education for ambitious and impressionable art students who are looking to get a small window into expanding their reach into the art world. It serves to establish a strong foundation for their creative talents and prepares them for college-level classes of their desired major. Lastly, this also prepares them to create a strong portfolio for their desired competitive school of choice by bulking up lived-life experiences.

As an adult with a lot more life experiences, my reflection looking back is more of slight nostalgia and some level of fondness. I still feel very negatively about some of the forced social interactions that were expected of students within the program. As a hard-of-hearing person, hearing in loud and large groups of people was extremely difficult for me. Additionally, I believe I only had one hearing aid at the time, so carrying on conversations was another layer of struggle that I honestly did not need. However, I can understand the intention behind this method as it challenges teenagers to learn how to interact with people who bring various facets of cultures and personalities as they near their beginnings of entering the adult world.

On this final note, I want to include this personal essay, which is an internal reflection that conveys my insecurities at the time during my experience in the program. The reason for this inclusion is to demonstrate growth in my artistic journey as a whole, and hopefully this can inspire any of you readers that happen to make their way to this page of my website.

I did hold some reserved feelings about my own inadequacies as a teen artist at the time. This was my first time being exposed and introduced to fellow artists that were exceptionally talented in their own right; the likes of which I had never seen in my own high school before. For the first time in my life, I felt as if my level of artistic skill was being measured among my own peers in a real measurable way that I have never experienced before. I struggled with this in a way that I couldn't express or even understand. I had a hard time figuring out a solution to this internal problem, and I was faced with the reality that this wasn't going to be a problem I could easily solve - at least not overnight.

As I look back at this point of my life, I can objectively look at this as a critical learning curve in my artistic journey, as well as a good basis of my growth as an artist. This also serves a moment in time that marks the beginning of my "collection" of lived-life experiences. What I have come to accept and embrace is that I will never know everything there is to know, and there will be things in my artistic abilities that I will not be able to achieve. And honestly: that is absolutely okay! I can admire and celebrate my artist peers with the utmost genuine affection while also acknowledging my own shortcomings. I can take bits and pieces of ideas from other works of art and incorporate them into my own. Art is life in of itself, and with that comes having to have experiences and a collection of stories. The most important aspect of being an artist is being able to creatively express yourself in a way that can imitate and communicate life in a unique way that only the artist can interpret. This can be from a multitude of points of views. I have bulked up a lot of stories and events in my life - the good, bad and the ugly - that have gradually shaped the way I want to create my works of art and what kind of message I would like to share with many viewers and other artists alike. 

This is my strongest piece of evidence as to why I fully support programs like CCY, and why these programs should be offered to high school students. Young artists need to build experiences and stories pulled from their lived experiences, which only strengthens the artist's work in the long-run. I hope this blog entry has inspired any of your readers. Feel free to check out the rest of my page. Until next time, go out there and live life!